The Apprentice . . . sucks !

When there's nothing on television, you just have to watch something. Do that or go crazy.

So I decided to watch BBC One's The Apprentice, where 17 devious, indsidious, sly, sneaky, treacherous, crooked. . . Right, you get the picture about what I think the contestants are like. I tried to think of 17 adjectives to describe them best, but I guess I can't think of them all.

The first task, Alan Sugar said, who incidentally can't run a football club but thinks he can run a business, was to start up a cleaning company. A cleaning company ? A flippin' cleaning company ?! Very interesting, Alan. . . You might claim to have a fantastic chain of businesses, Alan, but you won't ever win "The Most Entertaining Ideas For Your Stupid Programme" award !

The boys team, named Empire (Been listening to far too much Kasabian for my liking) decided to hose cars, but with the windows open !! Cue angry car salesman rating and raving at the clueless idiots, who protest their innocence.

The girls team, on the other hand, are just as bad; they decided to wash luxury cars with oven cleaner, which, unsurprisingly, didn't go down well with Alan once the task was eventually completed. Are you surprised ?

After the programme, which I thought was very bad, I shook my head, thought about how poor Auntie Beeb was getting, and had a can of coke. Now that was more exciting than The Apprentice. . .